On the sauna or bathhouse….
AN AFTERNOON AT THE SAUNA: Fellow blogger and friend from England hoiphalloi.tumblr.com has written and sent me two stories* that capture a part of gay-life culture—the bathhouse. Note that condoms are central to the lifestyle he portrays. The blogger’s own preference both emotionally and for health-safety reasons is sex with partners with whom one has a trusting (and ideally loving) relationship. We shine light here, however, on bathhouse culture (and the various forms that may take in practice) with an eye toward advancing “safer” sex,** particularly for younger brothers less familiar with scourges of earlier decades and older brothers who may need a reminder every now and then….
Photo Source: mydeviantcock
No. 1 of 2: AN AFTERNOON AT THE SAUNA*
I arrived at 1pm, an hour after opening time, so there were already quite a few people there but not too many (one of the best sauna experiences I ever had was when I arrived first and the place was empty, but I’ll tell you about that another time). First I went to relax my muscles a bit in the big rectangular jacuzzi. The porn film playing on the big screen over the far end looked like a Kristen Bjorn, but didn’t turn me on; I was too distracted by the distorted shapes caused by the wide screen – everyone’s head looked like a rugby ball, and their dicks were either stretched long and thin when they were horizontal, or stubby and squat when they were pointing straight up. I was alone in the jacuzzi, and it amused me to notice that each of the men who came along considered joining me, and decided against it – when there’s only one person there you either have to sit close to them because you’re sure you want to get it on, or go to the other end because you’re sure you don’t. If you’re undecided it’s best to avoid the dilemma altogether. So after bubbling away for a while I got out and went to towel off in the heat of the sauna cabin. The red towels provided – long enough to go round the most corpulent midriff, but too narrow to cover more than ass and balls – don’t dry all that well, and the hot dry atmosphere helps, as well as feeling nice.
There were three other guys in the sauna, one of whom seemed interested in me. He sat sideways just in front of me and kept looking at my dick, which responded by getting quite hard without me touching it, but he didn’t have the nerve to make a grab and I didn’t feel like being too helpful, at least not just yet. One of the others was much more interesting. He only stayed a moment before leaving, but a few minutes later he came back, sat down and smiled at me. I was amazed that this tall, muscular, slightly hairy man was interested in me; he looked like one of the Dieux du Stade! But he smiled at me again, then made a head gesture that obviously meant “let’s go somewhere else together,” so I followed him out. He said hello and asked me if I was a top or a bottom. “Both,” I said, to which he replied “Well I’m a bottom.” That suited me – this walking god not only liked me but wanted me to fuck his ass! We went into a sort of cabin next to the jacuzzi, but there was no light so I suggested we go upstairs. Once we found a cabin two floors up, he said he was still a bit wet and continued towelling himself off. I was a bit wet too, but I quite like being wet when I have sex – besides, if it’s any good, the sweat’s going to make you even wetter (that reminds me of another story to tell you another time.…) so I stood and watched. He looked at me and said “Yeah, jerk it,” so I did, then started caressing and stroking his hairy chest, ass and nipples from behind. He turned round, asked me if I was “clean” (I answered “yes”), knelt down and sucked my cock until I had a raging boner (that took all of 45 seconds), then asked me if I wanted to fuck him now. “Yes, got a condom?” I asked. It turned out he hadn’t, so he went off to get one.
As I was waiting I noticed there was a hole in the partition with the next cubicle, so I put my dick through it, just for fun. Someone started expertly sucking it from the other side. I was surprised – I didn’t know there was anyone in the next cubicle – but this was definitely one of the pleasanter surprises I’ve had lately. And whoever it was, he was doing a great job, patiently varying the rhythm of his sucking and keeping me bone hard while I waited for my rugby god to get back and let me fuck him. Once or twice I’m sure he tried to put a condom on me, but he either failed or changed his mind. But the minutes went by and no one came (a few interested heads were poked round the door, but none of them was the one I was waiting for) and eventually I said to myself the fucker wasn’t coming back. And you know, I wasn’t that disappointed. I realised I’d been put off by his questions – are you a top or a bottom? – for heaven’s sake, you could make out with someone for half an hour without knowing the answer to that. It wouldn’t be a problem whatever the answer was, and if it turned out you were both looking for the same thing you could part amicably, continue the hunt, and no harm done (no time wasted, either). Are you clean? – could mean anything from what’s my HIV status to did I wash my foreskin to how many points do I have on my driving licence – not to mention his insistence on towelling off before getting down to business…. He wanted everything cut and dried, and that’s the opposite of how I like things. I prefer ambiguity, uncertainty and a certain amount of mess. In fact his looks were too much for me as well. Maybe if I’d been there longer before running into him I’d have been up and ready for him, but he was too much, too fast.
When I realised he wasn’t coming back I decided to take a look at the guy who’d been giving me such a great blowjob, so I left the cubicle and knocked on the next door. He let me in, and turned out to be not bad at all, about my age, quite muscular with a huge cock and a ready-lubed asshole. He sucked me some more – even better now, as he could vary the angle without a glory hole to cope with – and eventually the moment came when I wanted to be inside his ass. “Got a condom?” I asked, and he said he hadn’t but he would go and get one. So there I was a second time, waiting for a willing asshole and with that hole in the wall winking at me (from the other side this time), so I gave it another go. And once again, someone started sucking me – every bit as expertly – from the other side. And once again, the fucker I was waiting for didn’t come back. I was feeling quite bold by this stage, so I stood just outside the cubicle without my towel, playing with my hard cock. There weren’t many people circling round, but there was one guy opposite me, looking at me and stroking himself under his towel. After a while I went into the cubicle and stood facing him, letting my dick speak for me. He followed me in, and started sucking as only an experienced bitch knows how. I fucked his face for several minutes, tweaking his nipples and encouraging him to tweak mine. He took me all the way down his throat, right down to my pubic bone – and I was close to cumming, but didn’t want things to finish that fast. He was a guy I’d already seen, and passed over in favour of my rugby man (who’s probably never been near a rugby pitch in his life, but you see how my imagination works): forty-something, hairy chest and legs, leather-studded cockring. After sucking me a while he was as hard as I was. Enough of fucking his face, I wanted to fuck his ass. And (hallelujah!) he had a condom with him. I let him put it on me (it’s so much nicer when the bottom does all the work) and position his ass for me to penetrate him. It took some time, he was quite tight. But once I was safely in, I turned him round so he could brace himself against the back wall of the cabin as I slowly, slowly drew myself out and slid back in again. I always like to start really slow and gentle, and then once the other guy has relaxed I surprise him by slamming hard and fast until he starts moaning – then I go back to slow tender back and forth, which usually gets them begging me to bang them hard again! This one apparently couldn’t take too much of this, as it wasn’t long before he eased himself off my pole and knelt in front of me to suck me again.
I’m sure you know what it’s like when you’ve been building for some time – getting great blowjobs from four different guys, plus the frustrated promise of a fuck twice – and there I was, fucking this guy’s face, thinking “I don’t want to cum yet” and “yeah but no one else is going to suck me like this today.…” and my dick and balls took over from my mind. “Oh, fuck, I’m going to cum,” I said He popped me out of his mouth at the crucial moment (that was a disappointment; I like it when guys let me cum in their mouths, just as I love a guy cumming in mine) and I shot my load over his face, groaning and moaning fit to wake the damnedest souls in the underworld (did I mention I make a lot of noise when I cum? Well maybe that’s another story for yet another time….). Afterward he gave me a peck on the cheek and said something I didn’t hear. I went back downstairs to unwind once more in the jacuzzi.
There was one guy already in the bubbling water, so I sat deliberately close enough to him for him to think I might be interested, but not so close that he’d be sure (in fact, after the orgasm I’d just had, I wouldn’t have been interested if Brad Pitt had been in the jacuzzi. No, on reflection, that’s not true…. and I just let myself relax, eyes closed, until my post-ejaculatory euphoria had subsided enough for me to think about what I might do next. The steam room seemed like a good idea; so far I hadn’t been in there all afternoon, and even if I wasn’t feeling horny any more, it would be warm, damp and relaxing. So that’s where I went, and after watching a group of guys sucking and wanking together I found myself getting hard again. The man next to me wanted to play with my dick, so I let him have a try – but either he had too many teeth, or he didn’t know how to give a blowjob (isn’t it incredible how many men, after years of sucking cock, never get any good at it?), or he just enjoyed doing things that I found painful, or (most likely) my dick was unusually sensitive after the seeing-to it had already had – so eventually I brushed him off (politely, I hope) and started wanking to my own fantasy. Which wasn’t difficult, in that dark, hot, damp place full of naked men and shadows. I found I got hard and stayed hard quite easily, but it took me for ever to cum. When I did, the pleasure was enhanced no end by the resonance that big tiled steam room provided for my moans and groans! (Did I mention I’m a bit theatrical at times?)
After that, all that remained was to unwind once more for a few minutes in the jacuzzi, get my stuff from the locker room, get dressed, steal one of the towels (they’d given me three by mistake), come home, open a bottle of red wine and write this.
Note: I think there are enough clues in this (true) story to identify the sauna where it took place, for anyone who has been there…
© Hoiphalloi, January 2012